It could be any given Sunday, but it’s not. It’s the day after our 5th Anniversary, and I’m plugging away at two freelance writing projects, and you’re watching the afternoon football game. So, let’s get down to it: We haven’t had a perfect beginning, but we’re still here, together. And I actually found a card that sort-of-but-not-quite reflected the way I’m feeling at this moment about “us”. Yet, I’m still not satisfied.
Traditional card-giving has never been my “thing”, because I always have to resist the urge to hide, spew sarcasm or hum off-the-wall tunes while the receiver reads the overly effusive, mostly unrecognizable sentiment, printed on ($4.50 – $8.95) high quality paper stock with matching envelope and often a resealable, clear plastic sleeve for good measure. Occasionally, I’ve succumbed to making my own card if there is lack of funds and/or extra time.
You said that you loved the card, and I, too, had tried to convince myself that I had finally succeeded in hitting the mark yesterday, but today is a new day. Now, for some, serious contemplation of the “perfect” birthday or anniversary card is rather trivial, and maybe rightly so in your case, but I’ve never been one to just throw words around (or send them) carelessly, even if they’re not my own. I didn’t need volume or poetry, but the “right” words would have reflected the way I feel about us after five years of marriage and fifteen years total of “togetherness”. The “right” phrases would have told of the long road trips, late-night dinners, dish washing and trash-duty squabbles and past New Year’s Eve celebrations, rolling it into something tangible that we both could grab hold of and continue to build on as we ride out this life together for the next five years and beyond. The perfect card would have easily shown the laughter behind our tears and the passion beneath our anger. It would have empowered me in such a way that even in my darkest, I would still be assured that you understood my hopes and desire for you. And I would know in my heart that your love for me runs as deep as your faith which has been (and always will be) even stronger than our bond. This sentiment-so-right would have marked us both as unworthy and foolhardy at times but sincerely blessed to have each other’s true affection and solid presence in this fickle world. And yes, our fragile natures would have been printed and held up to scrutiny, but we would have thanked each and every star that we have the other for protection from ridicule and harm. We would have seen our crazy love, plain and clear, no matter the feelings of yesterday, today or tomorrow. We would have seen “us”, for better and for worse.
Oh well, I’m just glad you liked the card. Happy Anniversary, Love………